I have to tell my “I was there, Gandalf” story about this:
Before Wrath of Khan originally came out in theaters, there was a rumor going around that Spock dies in the movie. WHAT??? So then, we go see the movie, full of trepidation–and Spock dies in the very first scene! WHAT!!!
And THEN, turns out the Kobayashi Maru mission was just a simulator test, and Spock gets up, and everything’s fine. And Kirk saunters in here and says this line, and Spock gives that face and the giant LAUGH OF RELIEF that went up in the theater! Haaaahahahaha so this is where that rumor came from, LOL, ahhhh, now we can all relax.
This is a friendly heads up that the Oxford School of Rare Jewish Languages has opened applications for their language classes beginning in Michaelmas term (October) 2023. They offer classes in 18 Jewish languages, including Old Yiddish. Classes are on Zoom, so applicants can live anywhere in the world. The deadline to apply is September 5, 2023.
The most common geographical evidence we have from ancient Rome are catalogs of places. Roman maps, to the extent that they existed at all, were almost certainly rare and expensive. Ordinary Romans would not have had access to them. Instead, Romans would have used itineraria, which are just what they sound like — lists of the places a traveler might encounter along a certain road. Many itineraria are catalogs of the milestones that the Roman government placed on its road network.
One of the more famous itineraries is found on a set of cups that were excavated in Vicarello; they describe the route from Cadiz, Spain to Rome.
“Thoughts on one of the hardest things: banishing the imagined bad faith reader from your writing process” by Melissa Febos on Twitter is hitting really hard today.
I remember when I fist saw this how hard it hit me. I’d been writing too much for the bad faith reader and not enough for the loving reader.
kids remind me, often, of the things i’ve taught myself out of.
i have a big dog. he looks like a deer. he is taller than most young children. while we were on a trail the other day, a boy coming our direction saw us and froze. he took a step back and said: “i’m feeling nervous. your - your dog is kind of big.”
goblin and i both stopped walking immediately. “he is kind of a big dog,” i admitted. “he’s called a greyhound. they are gentle but they are pretty tall, which is kind of scary, you’re right. their legs are so long because they are made for running fast. i am sorry we scared you. would you like us to stand still while you move past us, or would you feel more safe in your body if we move and you stay still?’
"oh. i didn’t know that about - greyhounds. i think i … i want to stay still,” he said. at this point, his adult had caught up to us. “i’m nervous about the dog,” he told her, “so i’m - i’m gonna stay still.” she didn’t argue. she didn’t make fun of him. she just smiled at him and at me and held his hand while goblin and i, with as wide of a berth as we could make, crept our way through.
behind us, i heard him exhale a deep breath and kind of laugh - “he was really big, huh? she said it’s because greyhounds have to go fast.”
“he was big,” she said. “i understand why that could have made you a little scared.”
“yeah. next time i - next time do you think i could maybe ask to touch him? when - i mean, next time, maybe, if i’m not nervous.”
later, going to a work event, in the big city, i stood outside, trembling. my social anxiety as a caught bird in my chest. i took a deep breath and turned to my coworker. she’s not even really my friend yet. i told her: “i feel nervous about this. i am not used to meeting new people, ever since covid.”
she laughed, but not in a mean way. she said she was nervous too. she reached her hand out and held mine, and we both took another deep breath and walked in like that, interlinked. a few people asked us - together? - and i told the truth: i feel nervous, and she’s helping. over and over i watched people relax too, admitting i feel really kind of shy lately actually, thank you for saying that.
the next time i go to an event, and i feel a little scared, i ask right away: wanna hold hands? this feels a little dangerous. i hesitate less. i don’t hide it as much. i watch for other people who are also nervous and say - it’s kinda hard, huh?
i know, logically, i’m not good at asking for help. but i am also not good at noticing when i need help. i’ve trained myself out of asking completely, but i’ve also trained myself to never accept my own fears or excuses. i have trained myself to tamp down every anxiety and just-push-through. i don’t know what i’m protecting myself from - just that i never think to admit it to anyone.
but every person on earth occasionally needs comfort. every person on earth occasionally needs connection. many of us were taught independence is the same thing as never needing anything.
each of us should have had an adult who heard - i feel nervous and held our hand and asked us how we could be helped to feel safe. no judgement, and no chiding. many of us did not. many of us were punished for the ways that we seemed “weak”.
but here is something: i am an adult now. and i get nervous a lot, actually. and if you are an adult and you are feeling a little nervous - come talk to me. we can hold hands and figure out what will help us feel safe in our bodies. and maybe, next time, if we’re brave, we can pet the dog that’s passing.
fuck it, i never ever do those “reblog for X, this one really works!” posts, but this one doesn’t have any of that BS, this is just straight up wishing us good things; and then the comment doesn’t even say any of that either. Zero claims on this post, all positive vibes
May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love
May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love
